a few things in this order:

1. going for a walk at 7:30 am
-this bird it is singing
-this bird stares up at the white sky
-this robin runs across the street, worm dangles from it's mouth
-a woman is kind and gives me half a cup of milk
-innocent streets, lilac, camellia, Bella pees in the dewy grass
-the layers of Douglas Fir on the hills surround me like a mother

2. my girlfriend was attacked by someone in the Seymour Mountains yesterday
-she was with a pack of dogs, they did not try to help her
-he threw rocks at her
-she fought him off and got away
-they still have not found him
-powerful Valerie would eat him for dinner

3. I ACTUALLY FEEL GRATITUDE RIGHT NOW!
-inflated chest
-i feel like crying
-golden light between my eyes
-everything has the same name: beautiful beautiful beautiful

I used to practice Creative Visualization
i would write lists and stick collages on my wall beside my bed
Africa, my dream house, love, flowers, puppies, friendship, a van with a bed in it.

I would close my eyes and see myself doing and having everything that I wanted
Dream Job: creative genius idea person paid lots of money to play!travel!express!
Safari in Africa: dancing in a frenzy around a fire, sitting with elders, hanging out with gorillas
Love: a life partner, the person I wanted to rush home to, the perfect man for me.

Lately I have been very focused on what I do not want in my life.
I will focus again on what it is I do want.

I appreciate creative visualization.
and all the other stuff too.

Love,