harmony with yellow lines

:

Woke up like a Monday kinda gal

Took the Powell bus to china town with my bike on the front rack
an old dude I’ve seen wandering around horseshoe bay is beside me
I ask him:
How are you doing?

He says:
I don’t know
I can’t remember that

And I feel miserable
Meant to wear my rain coat but opted for the absorbent wool one instead
But that’s not why
It’s the downtown eastside, it’s raining
I am not grateful
I can only see lack

And my business coach can see it
That I don’t appreciate things
Am not into my business
Not working hard enough

I look at her and she says she can see me telling her to fuck off
Cause I’m like:
Hey lady I work my ass off and you don’t know what its like to flog greeting cards,
Cold call on businesses
And try to get them to buy your shit.
And that January is the worst month
To try and sell anyone anything let alone
Just before the fucking Olympics!
Our town is on hold

Is it OK to drink wine in the early afternoon?

So anyways, I leave her office in a shitty mood
I’m being that Monday kinda gal

And I’m leaving the bank after having confirmed
that I have no money and still owe part of my rent
and would like to contribute
but can’t seem to find a way

But I can, of course I can
I just don’t

And I’m biking up Burrard pretending to know that the chatter in my head
Isn’t me
It’s only my mind
And it’s not real and all is beautiful really
It just looks wet poor and ugly

A woman opens her car door,
in an instant I am on the ground
My hat flown off
my bike on my body
And I think
Hey I wonder if a car is going to run over my head?
But no car comes.
I get up
And walk to the sidewalk

A man brings me my bike
And I hold onto it
Piece of shit that no one will steal
he asks me if I want to go to the hospital
But I’m not really hurt
Just a scratched knee
The driver comes and asks to take me to the hospital
I snap at her
I’m not hurt!
I just scratched my knee!
And walk away with my bike and stupid hat and cry

Thank you wonderful free business coach that puts up with my insanity
Thank you beautiful old man with a hole in his knee that says it’s better than nothing
Thank you unschmooshed head
And for the man who checked up on me
And the bird that is crying
One brave bird singing on this rainy rainy afternoon
Thank you woman who knocked me off my bike
The timing was perfect
No cars
Just me, the pavement and the man who came to help.



thank you, audra